Need a card? Check the Dysfunctional Section of Hallmark Store! (Italics are inside card)
I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now that you've come into my life... I've changed my mind.
I must admit you brought religion into my life... I never believed in Hell until I met you.
As the days go by, I think how lucky I am ... That you're not here to ruin it for me.
Congratulations on your wedding day! ... Too bad no one likes your husband.
Someday I hope to marry... someone other than you.
Happy birthday! You look great for your age... Almost lifelike!
When we were together, you said you'd die for me... Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.
We've been friends for a very long time... What do you say we stop?
I'm so miserable without you... It's almost like you're still here.
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy... Did you ever find out who the father was?
You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket... I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.
Looking back over the years we're been together, I can't help but wonder... what was I thinking?
I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And now that you've come into my life... I've changed my mind.
I must admit you brought religion into my life... I never believed in Hell until I met you.
As the days go by, I think how lucky I am ... That you're not here to ruin it for me.
Congratulations on your wedding day! ... Too bad no one likes your husband.
Happy birthday! You look great for your age... Almost lifelike!
When we were together, you said you'd die for me... Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.
We've been friends for a very long time... What do you say we stop?
I'm so miserable without you... It's almost like you're still here.
Congratulations on your new bundle of joy... Did you ever find out who the father was?
You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket... I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.
Looking back over the years we're been together, I can't help but wonder... what was I thinking?
